Song Title: A Woman On Paper


Click Here to download the MP3 file for A Woman On Paper

NOTE: This song is NOT in any way at all about my wife. It was written for the competition at SongFight.org, where each week entrants write a new song using the song title the site gives out. The title for the week I entered was "A Woman On Paper", so that is how the song got its name.

A Woman On Paper

Verse 1:
I got me a girl
we're as tight as can be
but there's something a little unusual
about her personality

She's no typical chick
not into girly stuff
other women all fear her
'cause she comes off tough

As a kid she was a tomboy
always full of dirt and grime
she loved playing sports
at recess time

Some learned to cook
but she took shop
some hung at the mall
she worked at a truck stop

She wears no makeup
there's no dye in her hair
doesn't even own one sexy pair
of underwear

But she's my little baby
and I'm a happy guy
It's like Cupid shot his arrow
and hit a bullseye

Chorus:
Even though she's a woman on paper
she thinks just like a man
she's my lover and very best buddy
I'm her super duper number one fan

Verse 2:
She's a woman on paper
but acts like a man
she loves to read magazines
while she's on the can

She rules the poker table
while smoking a cigar
and whips out a wrench
when there's trouble with her car

She can throw a punch
and kick some ass
she chugs straight from the bottle
never uses a glass

She can re-grout your tiles
while blasting Metallica or Korn
She hates foreign movies
and loves to watch porn

Being with her makes me happy
feel my increased heart rate
now my life is complete
I finally found a soul mate

Chorus:
Even though she's a woman on paper
she thinks just like a man
She's my lover and very best buddy
I'm her super duper number one fan

Verse 3:
She acts like a man
but she's a woman on paper
when she lets loose a fart
I almost die from the vapor

She scratches her crotch
and picks her nose
her closet is full of
androgynous clothes

While watching football
she pounds down the brews
and after having sex
she always takes a snooze

She hates to dance
and won't ask for directions
gets bored at museums
prefers beer can collections

Her brain is male
but her body's another gender
like her DNA got mixed in
a chromosomal blender

Outro:
'Cause she's a woman on paper
only a woman on paper
ya, just a woman on paper

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